Healthy Food and Digestive “Aides?”

Oh Thursday. I should just call it my late night blog session. Everyone else is on the 5th in the world. But here, I’m still on the 4th, so I can say “May the fourth be with you” for a couple more hours.

I bought a lot of produce today. I better get on my ass to eat it because I have bell peppers, tomatoes, carrots, a little bit of celery, lettuce, strawberries, sweet potatoes (pre-cut into fries, so that’ll be easy), and a whole lot of mandarin oranges. If anything, that gives me absolutely no excuses for eating healthy in the next seven days. Hell, I probably forgot something in that list. It was a very healthy shopping trip.

We are going to ignore the fact that I bought cheesey garlic breadsticks. Those definitely don’t qualify as healthy, but they’re delicious.

Also, I managed to try something new: kombucha. I found this one that was a ginger and berry flavor to help mask the fact that it tastes like sweaty humans and vinegar. It did… although, I still got that back note of sweat and vinegar. Kombucha is definitely one of those things that you have to go, “This is good for me so I’m fucking powering through this shit.”

Well, at least for me, that’s how it is.

I managed to injure myself at work today. Yeah, I had a meager four hours, but apparently, that was enough to make sure that I left with a new “battle wound.” I, of course, use that term loosely, because I am definitely still too much of a wimp to ever be a soldier.

I was removing shelves from a fixture, and when I was carrying them, it was sideways, trying to assure that I was grabbing them comfortably. Well, one of them… I didn’t have as strong a grip on it as I thought. Instead of stopping, it swung around and scraped just under my ear. So now, I have this beautiful, long red line underneath my ear.

Can’t take me anywhere, I tell you…

All I can say is that I am so glad I am off the next couple days. After shopping, I decided to test out a colon cleanse (It is literally a tablet/pill thing called Colon Clenz). I have complicated views on the idea of colon cleansing. The human body is usually pretty darn good at taking care of itself, and sometimes, I don’t think we trust those natural systems enough. However, I also believe that things can get slightly “off” and there’s nothing wrong with seeking something like a colon cleanse to maybe help get rid of that “off” feeling.

When I say “off,” I mean that slight discomfort, indigestion sort of feeling. You know, when things aren’t working as they should, but you aren’t at the point of being sick. You’re just “off.”

That’s where I’ve been. I’m eating well, for the most part, but I feel a little bit “blah.” So, I thought I would give one pill a shot and see what it does for me. Maybe it will help make me feel fantastic after it’s done with the dirty work. Ha ha. I didn’t even mean to put that sort-of pun in there. I’m inadvertently hilarious sometimes.

As long as it isn’t the kind of thing that will prevent me from sleeping (the bitches on the box say it’s gentle, so I’m hoping we have the same idea of what “gentle” means), I’m sure everything will be fine. If it doesn’t let me sleep, then Kelsey is going to be angry at the fact that she trusted reviewers that claimed they took it before bed without issues.

Wish me luck. Of course, if it goes downhill, it might be a hilarious story for all of you when I come to write about my day tomorrow. I’ll try to find you another hilarious anecdote if this is uneventful.

Until then,

Kels

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